"Dear Pee" Rose's story

Image courtesy of dearpauline.bigcartel.com

Hi Everyone! Happy New Month! I am glad you made it.
Welcome back to Pee's Blog! Sorry for the silence last week... It was quite an "eventful" week but I am back and better. I thought to share a story I received from Rose recently.
Please note that the name 'Rose' is only a formulated name to keep the writer's name confidential and is NOT her real name. Plus, It's a real story. I hope it touches you as much as it touched me.

Dear Pee..

It is 3:50am, tossing and turning on my bed and I thought to use this opportunity to write this. I do not know who I would be encouraging but knowing that people have had hard times helps us when we go through our hard times; mine might not be as intense as yours or greater than someone else's' but trust me...these times were hard and I wished that at the snap of my finger they would go away. Though my victory is not complete yet, I am not where I used to be.

I was left at a tender age to be all by myself- There was no one; absolutely no one! I felt like no one cared if I lived or died. Waking up was a torment... At this time of my life, I was already a Christian but keeping the faith in this condition was so hard. I knew God was good I just didn't understand why he allowed such happen to me.... I knew he was near but not being able to see him and cry to him made me feel worse. I would tell him "you know I need you but you're so far away". I knew he wasn't far but the pain wasn't going either...

..... I hated being praised for being intelligent. How am I intelligent when I had to sit 'O' level exams five times?? This affected my attempt to seek admission into a normal school. I had no courage plus, I could not afford it. Life made no sense to me. I only had one thing to live for- for Christ! (Even though I still doubt this sometimes).

I luckily gained admission to study Accounting in the University of Jos, Nigeria. I call it lucky cos I know I was not qualified- I was grateful cos I never had to end up in bed with the person who helped me. I was walking back to my hostel one day after a lecture (prior to this time, I had gotten admission to another programme but could not continue because I had no money. Eventually, I chose to stay with a friend rather than return home.) I waved at this car to stop; It was my lecturer. After a few minutes of chatting with him, I asked him "Sir, will it be possible to get admission with this result?" surprisingly, that was it! After the first year, I realised this wasn't a scam but I needed to get my head around it.

 I worked full-time and schooled full-time. I worked as a marketer in a finance organisation which allowed me to sneak out; can't explain how I made it through, but I did. After the organisation folded up, things became extremely difficult... I got a job at a pharmacy working two shifts; 7am-2pm and 2pm-9pm. I was determined to put everything into it since I could no longer afford tuition fees and my final exams were around the corner. Not seating my exams meant; I would have to repeat the year which meant additional costs. Plus, I had taken my brother in- putting him through school, paying the bills, feeding, school materials..... meanwhile, staying "chicky" was a challenge.

One day, I had just finished a night-shift and I was really worried about my exams that were just a few days ahead. I was depressed and couldn't say it to anyone. I was about to cross over to get a taxi when this car signaled me with lights and horns, calling me- I thought I heard him call my name... I was sure it was someone who knew me.....

Stay tuned for part 2 of Rose's story :)

You can be next to share your story. Just email me; paulineodoje@yahoo.com or paulineodoje@gmail.com.

P.S,
A very Happy Birthday to my dear girl Mandy! you already know I love you! :*
Have a great week!

Love,
Pee.